As if I wasn’t nervous enough about tonight with B’s mom.. he told me to dress “nice.” So I spent forever picking out the perfect khaki skirt and knit top that was nice but not TOO nice, and cute, but not “sexy.” This is his mother, after all.
Now, I have big boobs. C or D depending on the brand… but they were NOT on display tonight. No cleavage showing whatsoever– I was wearing a work top.
We get to the comedy show, sitting in the second row, and I get called OUT as the big boobed girl in the room!!! The female comedian was talking about how she can’t jog because her boobs are too big then she scans the room, focuses on me, POINTS TO ME, and says “you know what I’m talking about… I bet if you tried to jog you’d get black eyes.” Then she mimed it. Then she called me the “big-tittied girl.” AWESOME. Totally what I want to happen when I’m out trying to make a good impression on my boyfriends’ mother.