Nursery ideas and wood issues…

As soon as I found out we were having a girl I went on a nursery ideas pinning-spree. Because obviously. One thing I was sure of was that I didn’t want a pink-splosion. I know we’re having a girl, and I’m not opposed to pink, and I’m sure she will have and wear lots of pink… but there is no need to make her room feel like it is dripping in pepto bismol. B has thanked me for this opinion.

We plan to leave the room as-is in terms of painting. I love the grey and the stripes and I think it will make a great nursery. As a refresher… this is what we are working with.

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When I started scrolling through nurseries on pinterest I found myself quickly drawn to nurseries that featured soft/cool colors like blue and aqua and sea foam green. Which I guess shouldn’t be a surprise because looking at our house, it is clear I favor those colors (albeit in a bit more saturated hues) anyways. These were my favorites… aqua with accents of pink and maybe gold.

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Since we are leaving the walls grey, we’ll need to work the aqua in with window treatments and bedding and other accents, but I’m feeling confident in the basic color scheme. What I am not feeling confident in is furniture choices. All of my favorite nurseries featured white cribs with white or painted furniture. Which is weird, because generally I strongly favor dark wood. But something about dark wood in a little girl’s nursery just looks off to me…

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Just seems a bit too… grown up maybe? Or startling with all the other soft tones? Especially in a room that so heavily features grey, I worry that brown wood tones will clash with all the grey and white.

So, easy enough, we just order a white crib right? Except it isn’t that easy. We have to think about matching the crib to the rest of the furniture in the room, which at a minimum will include a dresser and book case. To further complicate matters, B’s dad has offered to make us a piece of nursery furniture. He does wood working as a hobby, and makes really high quality beautiful pieces. Which means I really hate to have him paint a beautiful piece of heirloom quality furniture. It just feels like good quality furniture should be stained, not painted, right?

So our options are:

1) Go with my nursery preference– white/painted furniture throughout and deal with trying to work that piece of furniture (he’ll be making either the bookcase or the dresser) into future rooms full of dark wood furniture

2) Go with my household preference and stick with dark wood throughout so everything will match when the room is done being a nursery

3) Try to convince myself that a white crib doesn’t clash with a (non-painted) wood bookcase or dresser (and I’ve never really been good at layering in different pieces in a way that makes sense).

First world problems, I’m well aware. And yet a decision needs to be made. I am accepting opinion and suggestions for anyone that has thoughts!

Thoughts on weight, hormones, and will power.

I used to talk more on the blog about my never-ending struggles to lose weight. Then I got annoyed with myself and all the talking and the not-enough-action and just stopped. Which doesn’t mean I stopped trying. Well, sometimes I stopped trying. Then I’d try again for a while. Up and down, as always. 

And the main issue for me is that I have no will power. I know exactly what I SHOULD do. I understand nutrition and carbs and sugar and cardio and the benefits of strength training. It’s just that when it comes to the actually doing it all, I feel very “meh” about it, mostly. Especially the food part, because I really like food that is horrible for me. My natural inclination is to eat all the things (and a lot of them) and not move much. And I seem to be the sort of person who looks at a donut and gains weight, my body cuts me no slack. Which is really no excuse for the lack of doing-the-right-stuff… except…

A weird thing has happened. And I hesitated to write it here, because its one of those things that I’d sort of hate a person for if that person wasn’t me. But I think it’s important to my larger point so.. 

When I got pregnant my body started…. working. At first I thought it was just the nausea, but now at almost 2 months post nausea it seems to be just my pregnant self. I don’t crave so much bad stuff. I don’t want sweets every day, and if I do, I want 2 cookies, not 10. I don’t want to eat so much grease. I actually want to eat produce, every day. My pregnancy app says I should have “the appetite of a trucker” right now but I want to eat less now than I ever did before because I just get full faster. I’m thinking about food less and eating whatever I feel like and I’m losing weight. At 21 weeks pregnant I weigh 5 lbs less than I did the day I found out I was pregnant. And since I’m carrying around at least a couple extra pounds of baby, fluid, blood (you gain 40% blood volume by the end of your pregnancy) and extra boob-age… that means I’ve actually probably lost 10+ lbs of fat in the last several months. For the first time in my entire life, with absolutely no effort whatsoever on my part. 

And I’m grateful. I’m so grateful because I started this pregnancy overweight and it’s more important than ever that I do what I can weight-wise to keep me and the baby healthy. I’m only supposed to gain net 10lbs this whole pregnancy, so making it this far still under my BFP weight is an amazing gift. 

But. 

I’m also sort of pissed. On the way home from my 20 week appointment, I was in the car with B commenting on how I was surprised I’d made it this far and still under my start weight and without thinking I said “it’s like my body is just making me do and eat exactly what it needs without my having to try……… for the first time ever.” And then it hit me that this must be what it is like for people who are thin without trying. It isn’t that they can eat a ton of shit without ever gaining weight (usually). It’s that their natural inclination towards what to eat leads them to being thin. And I’m the same person that I was 5 months ago, the only thing that is different? My hormones. Which makes me feel like something about my hormones and/or body chemistry has me programmed to want to eat inappropriate amounts of the worst possible stuff all the time. And it sucks. Because I feel like maybe my issue isn’t solely that I have less will power than all the thin people walking around.

Maybe my biggest issue is that my default settings suck. Which makes it sort of worse if I can’t just blame myself for my weight problems– but realize that maybe I have a harder time than other people. Because realizing this doesn’t actually fix any portion of this problem– I still need to GET the will power to get myself healthier regardless of my natural inclinations. And I’m certain that this current influx of awesomely easy weight management is fleeting and will probably end any time now. 

Regardless, realizing all of this is really neither here nor there because it changes nothing. And I know that everyone has their own set of personal strengths and struggles. One of my never-ending struggles is managing my weight, but people who don’t have that struggle I’m sure have their own issues that I don’t have to fight against. But still, it has been an interesting journey getting to see the other side of the coin for a few months here. I can only hope that it keeps up long enough that I don’t have to rely on too much will power for the rest of my pregnancy. Because I can’t imagine, as I near the end of pregnancy and am getting really uncomfortable and cranky, will power is going to be easy to come by!

It’s a………..

Girl!!! (I’ve never been very good at building suspense).

We had the anatomy scan last week and everything with the baby looks just perfect! It was really interesting to watch the tech zooming in on and measuring each of her little features. Each bone in the arms and legs, each eye, her lips and nose and the roof of her mouth, the little chambers and blood vessels in her heart, her brain, etc. Unfortunately our baby girl doesn’t share my inability to build suspense though because she simply refused to give up the goods on her gender!

Throughout the whole first hour she had her legs clamped tight and just refused to open them for the tech. We tried everything to get her to move– the tech poked and prodded me, jiggled the bump, and eventually had me get up and do some jumping jack (lol)! After the jumping jacks baby girl had moved from laying sideways across me to sitting bum down, but she still had her legs together and knees pulled up in front of her. By the end of the scan the best the tech could tell us was that her best guess was girl, but she just couldn’t be sure.

Luckily for me (sort of) it turns out my placenta is a bit low-riding in terms of positioning. I guess this is an issue because if it is TOO low they don’t let you try for a regular labor, and instead fast-track you to a scheduled c-section as soon as you are full term. So to measure exactly where the placenta was, they needed to do a second (internal) ultrasound, and it was during that one that we were able to see for SURE that we were having a little girl!

Even though I’m not thrilled about the placenta issue, I’m so grateful that we got to find out what we were having for sure. And lucky for me the doctor said that he really thinks my placenta will move on up in time for me to have a normal birth. I have to go in for another ultrasound in January to check on its’ progress– which is pretty awesome because I didn’t think I’d get another ultrasound after the anatomy scan and it is always super fun to see our little girl again! (Especially now that she looks more like a person than a blob…).

Speaking of… while I have remained staunchly against sharing ultrasound pics on Facebook because I know they creep some people out and are a bit “TMI”… I figure if you came to my blog you might have to accept the inevitability of a select few of these shots! So here’s your last warning.. if ultrasound pics creep you out, look away!

This was my favorite pic, because it is a nice profile shot and it looked like she was waving at us when the tech snapped the shot.

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Ugh, can you even? It’s just so insane to me that there is a little person in there. And that she actually looks like a person now, rather than like a sort of creepy fish like the drawings of embryos/earlier fetuses. Also, the buddha belly! Although speaking of creepy… B’s favorite u/s pic is SUPER creepy IMO. This is a shot head-on looking at all the bones in her face. I think it looks like the punisher logo.. B thinks it looks like Bane from Batman. Either way? Super creepy lol

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I’m pretty sure that pic is going to end up in his cube!  In other baby-related news, we got a glider for the nursery-to-be! My parents were in town for Thanksgiving and stayed through the weekend so they could go to the anatomy scan with us. My mom had decided that she really wanted her and my dad to gift us a glider for the nursery, and that Thanksgiving weekend was the best time to do that.

I was slightly overwhelmed because it seemed like such a big purchase and I hadn’t really even thought about the nursery yet, but once we went shopping I found a glider I absolutely fell in love with and it was an easy choice. It’s from babies r us and its super cushy and swivels and glides (including the ottoman). We went with this style because the recliner/gliders don’t glide once they are reclined, and I thought that I’d mostly like to have my feet up while still rocking. We looked at some more traditional style wooden gliders too, which were actually surprisingly comfy, but this chair had both comfort and the look I fell in love with. So without further ado– the glider!

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It’s just hanging out in the corner of the office/nursery-to-be at the moment so excuse the desk, but I can already tell I love it with the paint (which I am leaving as-is once we convert the room). So exciting to have our first piece of nursery furniture!

So, that’s the news around these parts. Next up, I imagine, will be figuring out the rest of the nursery furniture and decor!